The Amazing Race 17, 8 p.m., CBS
Kids, the lesson we all should've taken away from last week's episode (other than
Nick is the biggest bad boyfriend on the planet) is that on AR, you NEVER GIVE UP. Because you never know when Phil's eyebrow is going to tell you it is non- elimination round. I can't wait to see how many time zones The Dumbs are actually behind at this point, with their six-hour penalty added to however many hours they were already behind. Think about it: She vomited for the team, puked her guts out, has nearly suffocated herself several times and been subjected to verbal humiliation, and her boyfriend can't sit on a boat and hold a flashlight. Nice.
Dexter, 9 p.m., Showtime
The season's penultimate episode. Last week was so great. It was like the quintessential Dexter episode: scary, tense, gory, and then at the end I got all weepy. It was really quite sweet between them. Of course we know something will go horribly wrong, because it's Dexter, but still. That was a nice moment.
Bridalplasty, 9 p.m., E!
There has been much gnashing of the teeth about this show in which brides-to-be compete against each other for plastic surgery before their Big Day. Like it matters. Does anyone but me remember a little show called Extreme Makeover? Or a show called Heidi Montag? We've already crossed over the other side, friends. Just ignore it and it will go away.
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